My Blog Jill Ferrin Bailey

  My motto has always been and always will be - " You are never beat until you quit... and I do not quit or give up!" This is my way of thanking people for being there for me. Doctors who went out of their way to help me, save me, and find out how to give me the quality of life I desired. I am sure I will miss many doctors, nurses, and so many others in the medical field  who contributed to my being here today. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Dr. Daniel Alsup - Who time and time again through so many challenges gave me truth, honesty and was there for me when I was fighting a battle with something we  did not know anything about. Dr. Kraig White - For all the hours and after hours, and time and energy you put into finding out. why my body does what it does and for just caring enough to research to save me. Dr. Gary Goucher -  We were not always on the same path, but I trusted you, your judgement. You literally saved me a few times from the brink of death and...

Some people make wishes when the clock hits 11:11 Today's date has me wishing I did not have to share this deep honesty. But something has been nagging at me, telling me its time. In my life I have hurt so many, way too many and I admit that unfortunately. Growing up took way too long for my heart, for my mind, and looking back I hate that girl. I hate all she did and who she was and its hard some days to realize it is me. I feel as if I have had people all throughout my life show me grace, forgiveness, compassion at times I should not have had any. I also have had people who just led me by example and who for whatever reason they loved me despite myself, despite who I was or even how I treated them or acted. Those are the people who I want to address for a moment because they are why I changed. At some point after hurting those closest to me in the worst way being my children something snapped, came to attention finally. I have had people who instantly came into my life and stayed...

 Hello 2 years ago someone said some really horrible things they wanted to do to me made threats that were on bodycam and to a judge. This person has fought for over 2 years  on this case believing that a woman should not have stood up to him. He is from Pakistan and women are not willing to stand up to men there which is so sad. Something in me changed I stood up and stood my ground. Layton City Prosecutors, Judges, Victim's Advocates. So many people who supported my belief that there was right and wrong. I did it for other women, I did it for myself, I did it to stand up and say it is not right. Every hearing hour after hour I always showed up, the judge would always ask if I was there I would always say I always will be. The prosecutor let me know today I won, he is pleading guilty  to the charges against me and to charges which were worse against another woman. In a few weeks sentencing will happen and I will get my chance to say what I want to say or  should I s...

First of all to explain as a background I am a retail merchandiser. I go from anywhere from 10 to 20 stores a day meeting with owners and managers to discuss their product. You build relationships, even friendships at times. I have done this for many years for different companies. You learn over time who you can be friendly with, who you need to be colder professional. I always try to do both, keeping it in the green zone the area where nothing you say or do anything that could be taken wrong. We get yelled at people take out their frustrations on us all the time. This sort of thing does not seem to rattle me, I always listening knowing they are having an emotional reaction to whatever their daily issue is. Sometimes there are those who for whatever reason their culture or their own self worth think they can push a personal interest in you I am always clear and precise that "No thank you, and I go back to talking about the product" This past week I was faced with an owne...

We all have dark moments in our lives, we all have dark thoughts, where our deepest fears,regret, and our insecurities lie to us, saying everyone would be better without us, or us without life. Moments when we feel not one more moment, not one more day, not one more heartache, not one more screw up, or one more disappointment you have either caused or experienced. Not one more! The moments where the peace that comes from leaving all the pain, anger, physical ailments, emotional pain, or mental pain just consumes you, overwhelms you. I have never known not one person who if they were honest didn't have that feeling at least once for even a fleeting moment. Some give in when the darkness overtakes them, some let it swallow them and let the adversary win. But most of us fight, struggle, through those worst of worst moments... we find one more moment we want, one more hug, we think we have more to do, we pick up we live and fight another day. The battle is real for us all som...

The Chair Dawn  had a chair for many years it grew faded, the fabric was worn, the legs and arms and back started to show through the stain. One day she put it out for garbage saying she did not want anything that did not look new and impressive for her beautiful home. An older man drove by he sees the old chair sitting there and pulls over as she walks out. He asks if he can take the chair if its meant for the garbage truck to pick up, Dawn thinks he must be desperate and nods her head.  The man starts to lovingly make a list of what it will require to make this chair whole again. He could see it in his mind, and wanted to make sure he gave it back the new life it should have. A new seat is required, new padding, new fabric, a leg is cracked almost split up the leg so he makes a note of this, he knows hours of sanding and staining will be required. The supplies he locates and starts searching for the perfect stain, he wants the chair to look like it...